JobsRated.com has taken a look at their URL, and decided that they should rate the best jobs in the world. (Methodology here; thanks to Diana Brodie for the pointer.) Obviously crazy, of course. I mean, Mathematician? Biologist? Philosopher? Dude, get serious.
1. Mathematician
Applies mathematical theories and formulas to teach or solve problems in a business, educational, or industrial climate.2. Actuary
Interprets statistics to determine probabilities of accidents, sickness, and death, and loss of property from theft and natural disasters.3. Statistician
Tabulates, analyzes, and interprets the numeric results of experiments and surveys.4. Biologist
Studies the relationship of plants and animals to their environment.5. Software Engineer
Researches, designs, develops and maintains software systems along with hardware development for medical, scientific, and industrial purposes.6. Computer Systems Analyst
Plans and develops computer systems for businesses and scientific institutions.7. Historian
Analyzes and records historical information from a specific era or according to a particular area of expertise.8. Sociologist
Studies human behavior by examining the interaction of social groups and institutions.9. Industrial Designer
Designs and develops manufactured products.10. Accountant
Prepares and analyzes financial reports to assist managers in business, industry and government.11. Economist
Studies and analyzes the effects of resources such as land, labor, and raw materials, on costs and their relation to industry and government.12. Philosopher
Studies questions concerning the nature of intellectual concepts, and attempts to construct rational theories concerning our understanding of the world around us.13. Physicist
Researches and develops theories concerning the physical forces of nature.14. Parole Officer
Monitors, counsels, and reports on the progress of individuals who have been released from correctional institutions to serve parole.15. Meteorologist
Studies the physical characteristics, motions and processes of the earth’s atmosphere.16. Medical Laboratory Technician
Conducts routine laboratory tests and analyses used in the detection, diagnosis, and treatment of disease.17. Paralegal Assistant
Assists attorneys in preparation of legal documents; collection of depositions and affidavits; and investigation, research and analysis of legal issues.18. Computer Programmer
Organizes and lists the instructions for computers to process data and solve problems in logical order.19. Motion Picture Editor
Supervises the filming and editing of motion pictures for entertainment, business, and educational purposes.20. Astronomer
Uses principles of physics and mathematics to understand the workings of the universe.
The real lesson, of course, is that it’s awesome to be a professor. Or a parole officer. Whichever.
And here are the worst jobs, of course:
1. Lumberjack
Fells, cuts, and transports timber to be processed into lumber, paper, and other wood products.2. Dairy Farmer
Directs and takes part in activities involved in the raising of cattle for milk production.3. Taxi Driver
Operates a taxi cab over the streets and roads of a municipality, picking up and dropping off passengers by request.4. Seaman
May perform any number of tasks involved in the operation of ships, boats, barges, or dredges.5. Emergency Medical Technician
Attends to situations which demand immediate medical attention, such as automobile accidents, heart attacks, and gunshot wounds.6. Roofer
Installs roofs on new buildings, performs repairs on old roofs, and re-roofs old buildings.7. Garbage Collector
Collects refuse on a designated municipal route, and transports trash to disposal plants or landfill areas.8. Welder
Joins or repairs metal surfaces through the application of heat.9. Roustabout
Performs routine physical labor and maintenance on oil rigs and pipelines, both on and off shore.10. Ironworker
Raises the steel framework of buildings, bridges, and other structures.
Interestingly, dangerous and low-paying jobs involving a great deal of manual labor seem to come in below the glamorous and largely sedentary lifestyle of a typical academic. Although opinions differ; my brother is an EMT, and he couldn’t be happier with the job.
OK, let’s get the Monty Python jokes out of the way right now. . . .
Their job descriptions sound oddly, er, odd. “Studies the relationship of plants and animals to their environment” might go better with ecologist than biologist, and it’s awfully eukaryote-centric to boot. “Uses principles of physics and mathematics to understand the workings of the universe” is just as much physicist as it is astronomer. And, of course, pure mathematicians don’t exist.
Math #1! Math #1! Math #1! Take that, physics! I guess there is some satisfaction in proving things over just accumulating evidence.
And, of course, pure mathematicians don’t exist.
They probably graphed the ratings based on the number of people in those jobs then. And not being mathematicians, assumed that since the asymptotic climb to infinity as the number of mathematicians went to zero, that mathematician was the best possible job.
I think mathematicians just have the jobs with the least amount of danger. What do you have to worry about, drinking too much coffee?
I am rather surprised that “soldier” is not in the list of “worst jobs” : Enforcing your nation’s security and other nation’s insecurity by employing suitable weapons.
I’ve been a sailor (submarine navy) and I am a mathematician (albeit a lousy one; I’ve got a few publications, all of which are of minimal importance)
And where I cannot say that being a mathematician is better than being a scientists, I can vouch for the relative positions of being a math professor and being a sailor.
The latter pays better but the former is much more desirable, at least to me. 🙂
Hmph. No Science Secretary? Whatevs.
Wow…. what a crappy criteria set. Physical demands are one of the criteria despite the fact that not everyone thinks that the optimal job is one where one never has to leave the desk.
My wife is starting to take a few classes at community college to get some employable skills (the University of Chicago did not seem to do much of this), and they given her a lot of career testing. So far, I’m struck my how much the set of recommended jobs varies from person to person. I don’t think the recommended sets for the two of us intersect at all.
If I wind up leaving physics, it will probably be due to the lack of any physical demands.
A quick click on “View Ratings” for Astronomer and Physicist shows one immediate reason why these might be overrated: The assumed workload is 45 hours per week in both jobs. I love my job, and so do most of my colleagues, but I don’t know a single one of them that works 45 hours a week.
I’m lucky enough to work in an environment found more-or-less near the top of the list, and spent my college days in a recurring summer job where I did a fair amount of roofing, along with rough carpentry and other aspects of home construction. Really puts things in perspective. I put a roof on a 4500 sq. ft. house once in the blistering heat of early August, and there’s nothing quite like hauling two 80 lb. bundles of shingles up a 40′ ladder when it’s 90 def. F out. Over and over. Follow that with baking above them as you try to nail them in place before they melt in your hands, leaving you covered with grit and tar. And did I mention bituthene? The evil that is bituthene? They don’t call it “bitch-a-thene” for nothing. I hate to make references to tar babies, but that’s exactly what I looked like after wrestling with a huge roll of that one hot, humid day.
My brother is an electrician, and he loves his job, but it’s a bit more cushy than framing and roofing. That said, it can be quite physically demanding, and it’s a pretty rough crowd he encounters almost daily on-site. Construction is a hard job, and it’s got a lot of hard people working it. As for EMTs: I’m also surprised it’s on such a low wrung. I was a certified EMT once, but made it through maybe 3 months of volunteer service before I gave it up and let my license expire. Too inconvenient, and not as educational as I hoped it would be. That said, the real EMTs, the people who trained me, were a little fanatical about it. My paramedic teacher was clearly a hard-core adrenaline junkie, though there can be very little excitement to the job much of the time. In fact, in my three months, the most “exciting” thing I ever encountered was an old lady immobilized in her bathroom with a prolapsed rectum. I worked a rural area. Which was fine, because the stories I heard about car wrecks made me atheistically pray for boredom. Takes a certain kind of personality, methinks, and those personalities appear to simply adore the experience of dealing with emergencies and saving lives. Nothing wrong with that, but it seems to be a highly self-selected workforce, which again makes the dissatisfaction seem somewhat odd.
They forgot the other worst job in the world: English major, where your most often used phrase is “You want fries with that?”
And you are always asked “Are you going to be a teacher?”
Lousy pay, rotten kids, worse parents, little to no respect – oh yeah!
@low math: I have a friend who is a paramedic and was previously an EMT. He got his paramedic training because as an EMT, he mostly spent his time retrieving morbidly obese people from their apartments, shuffling very old people from nursing home to the hospital and back, and bringing schizophrenics psych hospitals It sounds like it was fun at first but that he was looking for a little more. Being a paramedic seems to have fit the bill.
I guess my point before was that any rating system that works without reference to the personality of the person who will fill the job is probably crap. Roofing sounds really hard, and it probably wouldn’t be the top of my list; however, in high school, I worked some summers at boy scout camp doing a lot of manual labor. Despite living outside all summer in the humid Texas heat doing manual labor, it was one of the most enjoyable jobs I’ve had. I briefly considered becoming a forest ranger after that experience.
The top of my worst job list would have to include rodeo clown.
Seriously, Parole Officer at #14? Just a smidgen less desirable than Physicist?
One of the better jobs I had as a kid was working for a podiatrist. Washing feet, bandaging, cleaning up, talking with the old folks with bunions, corns, ingrown whats-its. Very physical, very humanizing work. Sometimes it’s nice to reconnect.
@OK, let’s get the Monty Python jokes out of the way right now. . . .
Since you insist. Everybody knows that the best job in the world is lion tamer.
Closely followed by accountant.
Really? No one noticed the glaring omission in worst jobs? Compiling job rankings!
# Sean Says:
January 6th, 2009 at 11:40 am
I think mathematicians just have the jobs with the least amount of danger. What do you have to worry about, drinking too much coffee?
——————
Sean, are you forgetting the professor at Stanford who was hacked to death (by an axe) by a disgruntled graduate student? 🙂
In all honesty, there are some classes (e. g. Business Calculus) where I feel dumber after each class than I did prior to the class.
When I get repeated questions of the following nature “how did you get x* (x + y)= x^2+xy?, well, my brain cells scream in agony.
(and no, I am not talking about convolution product! 🙂 )
Pingback: 6 January 2009 part II « blueollie
I have to agree with the others saying that the criteria here have some pretty dubious assumptions built-in. Beyond the weird idea that everyone wants a job that doesn’t require any movement, stress, or even accountability, the criteria are almost entirely negative. There’s no provision for someone actually getting something out of a job, other than a paycheck and possibly a swanky new title.
Maybe it would seem more accurate if it was called “Best Jobs for People Who Would Really Prefer Not Working at All But That’s Life I Guess.”
Pingback: Victory is ours! « Rigorous Trivialities
I’m also pretty amazed at the ranking of “Parole Officer”. Doesn’t one in that line of work deal with a clientele which includes certain individuals who might, say, have fewer compunctions than average about killing you if you piss them off? And, since part of your job is reporting violations of parole which could lead to reincarceration, doesn’t pissing off purportedly reformed criminals kind of come with the territory? That’s a good job? One of the BEST jobs??? Who knew!
Which magazine is it that does a worst jobs in science poll? Because I’m pretty sure that whale shit researcher is a worse job than taxi driver.
This sounds awfully close to the Treiman Standard International Occupation Prestige Score. Of course, the best job is being a CEO where one’s contract stipulates $10M if you do well and $10M severance if you screw up. You can’t lose, and no matter what, you never have to work again! I’d like to have a job where I’m properly motivated.
Whoever made this list needs to hang out with some geologists!
No, Sean, you won’t die as a mathematician from a surfeit of coffee. You die from spending too many sleepless nights thinking: “What am I going to do when the ideas stop coming??!!!”